Vacationing with the kids can put your organizational skills--and patience--to the test. There's transportation, accommodations, attractions and expenses to consider. And making the most of the experience can mean different things to different family members (you want to veg out on the beach; little Walter wants to hit the amusement park). On these pages you'll find tips--and trips--to help you enjoy getting there as much as being there.
Making Plans
Good planning means the difference between a fabulous vacation and a family feud on wheels. The Internet makes it easy to research destinations and hotels, read travelers' reviews and download checklists and safety strategies. Family-focused travel guides, like Fodor's Around the City With Kids series, are also helpful. And don't forget to talk to travel agents or friends who have been to your destination. More tips:
Plan for your family, not someone else's. Your vacation should fit the personality of your family. If your son loves sports and hates museums, for instance, this is not the year to visit the Studio Museum in Harlem. Consider your children's ages, maturity and interests, and your getaway desires and budget. Talk about the vacation style everyone wants.
Include something for everyone. Some families spend a third of their vacation on kids' preferences, a third on family choices and a third on adult interests. However you divide your time, be sure to include everyone's desires. "Each family member should get to see his or her first choice," says Kaleel Sakakeeny, a family-travel consultant and journalist in Boston.
Appoint junior planners. Nothing gets kids involved like giving them a role. Let them know their input matters. They can research online, download coupons, read brochures, even talk to friends who've been to your destination.
Make an itinerary. Create a vacation schedule, including phone numbers, hours of operation for attractions and downtime. It may sound like work, but an itinerary frees you from the time- and energy-sapping activity of constant decision malting on the go. "Itineraries are especially good for single parents, who must be twice as organized, patient and creative as their married counterparts," advises Brenda Elwell, author of The Single Parent Travel Handbook (Global-Brenda Publishing). Elwell created SingleParentTravel.net, a Web site dedicated to the subject.
Whet their appetite. Heighten your kids' excitement for the trip ahead by trying foods, listening to music or watching movies that relate to your destination. Check out library books with stories that take place in the region you plan to visit. "It really awakens their interest," says Kyle McCarthy, editor of the Web site familytravelforum.com. "These are wonderful ways to boost kids' enthusiasm about the place."
GOING THE EXTRA MILE Prepurchase tickets to museums, amusement parks or other attractions before you leave home. Lots of luggage? Ship, don't schlep: A service called Luggagefree picks up baggage anywhere and ships it to your destination for an initial fee of $20 plus $2 a pound. Minimum order: $95 ([800] 361-6871).
Getting There Can Be Half the Fun
You're harried. You're tired. You want to get to your resort and begin relaxing immediately. But remember that for many kids the journey is part of the vacation. That plane, bus, car or train ride may be just as exciting as anything else they'll do that day. To make the most of it:
Interact! This is a time for kids to bond with you, not their Game Boys. Don't rely on technology to occupy them. Tell stories, play word or card games, let your child read aloud. "You are your child's favorite toy," says Vicki Lansky, author of Trouble-Free Travel With Children (Book Peddlers).
Bring activities. Pack crayons and construction paper, activity books and toys, especially if you have little ones, recommends Amy Bohutinsky, consumer travel expert for Hotwire.com. "You might buy a new toy for your child--several if you have a long flight or drive--and produce it along the way as your child gets restless," she says.
Don't skip the snacks. Food can entertain and educate, especially if you bring foods relating to your destination. Besides, if you're traveling on a plane, you and your young ones will likely need more nourishment than the airline provides. Best bets: boxed juices and healthful, crumb-free snacks like baby carrots, sliced turkey, cheese, bagels and drinkable yogurt. Avoid overly sugary and salty snacks.
Let kids be copilots. Keep them engaged by giving them responsibilities. "Children over the age of 10 are great junior navigators," says Elwell of SingleParentTravel.net. "Have them help find a poorly marked exit or read road signs. A teenager can be a senior navigator, plotting the course of the trip. Very small children can locate safety exits on airplanes or on trains."
Keep children comfortable. "Kids travel best with empty bladders and full stomachs," Lansky says. Take bathroom breaks. Let them run off excess energy before getting into the car or on the bus, train or plane. On a plane, give them something to suck on during takeoff and landing to avoid painful ear congestion.
Make yourself comfortable too. Take care of yourself so you can be patient with your kids. Eat well. Create a designated quiet hour if you need it, and make sure everyone adheres to it.
GOIN THE EXTRA MILE Kid-focused books and music can help make an automobile ride less boring. Try these books published by Rand McNally: Are We There Yet? (featuring travel-related lyrics that can be sung to the tune of popular songs) and Kid's Road Atlas.
Being There
While traveling exposes you and your kids to new ideas, places, foods and people, it can also involve some discomfort, change and, at times, a lack of control. But you can have fun with your family no matter what happens. Some ideas:
Bring your sense of humor. Encourage kids to be good travelers by being one yourself. Be curious and open-minded. Look for the fun in every situation. "Your attitude is so important," says McCarthy of familytravelforum.com. "If we approach what's new and different positively rather than fearfully, our kids will do the same. Bring a spirit of adventure, and they'll have one also."
Relax some rules. Youngsters respond differently to new foods, disruptions in sleep patterns and jet lag. This is not the time to introduce new disciplinary methods. Remember, the kids are on vacation, too. Your best bet? Slow down. Get in tune with your children. Experience the destination at their pace.
Catch them being good. Of course, travel can be a great opportunity for the kids to practice maturity and manners, and to develop new strengths to bring home. Praise them for what they do right to cement the behavior. "If they behave well at a museum or are nice to Grandma, encourage them," Lansky says.
Do less. For today's overscheduled kids, an entire afternoon doing nothing but building a sand castle with their parents may be their most cherished vacation memory. So make room for downtime. Figure out what you want to see, then plan on doing half of that. If at the end of your trip you want to return to see more, the vacation has been successful.
Avoid the gimmes. To sidestep money meltdowns, decide how you'll handle souvenirs and spending money. Different families take different approaches. McCarthy recommends setting a daily spending allowance for your kids and sticking to it. "You can dole it out in the morning, or set a limit for each day."
Plan for adult time. True, you're here to spend time with the kids, but it's your vacation as well. Keep yourself refreshed enough to enjoy your family. At a resort, for example, hit the spa while the children do arts and crafts at the kids' club. In a city, hire a sitter through the hotel's concierge service, and go out to dinner while the youngsters sleep.
RETURNING HOME
Keep the memories alive. The trip is over, the bags are unpacked, and it's back to life as usual. Right? Not so fast. Extend your vacation--and what your kids learned from it--by keeping the experience fresh. Ask the kids what they liked best, what surprised them, what they'd like to do again. Prepare a meal based on foods you tried, share photos or your scrapbook with other family members, or continue a vacation ritual, such as talking over the day's activities before going to sleep. Incorporating new experiences into your home life can help keep the memories vivid. It also can help kids develop the habit of appreciating opportunities and experiences, a good attitude for daily life--and your next vacation.
